Supporting a Grieving Friend: Do’s and Don’ts

Grief-stricken individuals definitely need support. And a good friend is indispensable during these difficult times. There are, however, some best practices for what to say and what not say. In today’s blog, we are going to give you some suggestions on what to do and what not to do.

What to Do

Be available. Go to visit your friend on a regular basis, not just the first week after a loss. People often assume that the worst is the first week, but that is not necessarily the case. Continue to visit as long as your friend is not looking well. And just sit with them. Let them talk if they want to.

Take food. Grief-stricken individuals are often not hungry and do not have energy to make or shop for food.

Offer some resources. Leave a note when you visit with the numbers or websites of organizations that can help with grief or that offer support groups.

Share some nice stories of the deceased. These kinds of stories will be welcome.

What Not to Do

Never tell someone who has lost a child that the person can have another child.

Do not tell someone that they will feel better in time. Right now, they feel terrible. Just be present and show that you care.

Do not tell the bereaved any negative stories about the deceased. That is not helpful and does not help them grieve.

Do not call. Go in person or send a letter by snail mail. Bereaved individuals often do not want to answer the phone or talk on the phone.

Do not tell the person that the deceased is in a better place. Even if you believe that, the bereaved want the person here, not in a “better place.”

Do not tell the bereaved to be strong. The bereaved have to process the grief in any way that he or she can. 

If you need help planning a funeral, now or anytime, please feel free to call us on the Lower Mainland at (604) 463-8121. 

Maple Ridge Funeral Chapel and Crematorium, based in Maple Ridge, British Columbia, provides has been providing compassionate funeral services on the Lower Mainland for over 60 years. We have deep roots in the community and take great pride in caring ethics and exemplary service. If you have any questions about this article or would like to talk to us about funeral services, please call us at (604) 463-8121.